Okie, this article title has been sitting on my draft for quite some time, i thought it’s not time to talk about this yet, but thanks to my great reader, Ms. I-Don’t-Know-Who. she inspired me of how should i really put this into an essay form. sorry it’s gonna be a very boring and lengthy philosophy and if it’s gonna bore you, go away.
i have been using these 3 words for the past 4 years to summarize my bored-the-shit-out-of-you theory whenever someone ask me for my opinions on what makes a healthy relationship last. the 3 words were actually translated from 3 chinese words that have almost identical pronunciation but totally different meanings - 心, 信, 性. they are in an order of importance.
imagine relationship as a pot of magic potion, to me, these are the only ingredients needed in order for a relationship to really last long, lacking any of them would just be disaster. let’s get to the details, shall we?
Heart (心)
This is the fundamental ingredient of them all. why?
pretty simple, that’s simply because you use your heart to feel, and you use your heart to love. heart to relationship is like the engine to a car, the CPU to a PC or the Batteries to an MP3 player, otherwise, without the hearts of the two of you to feel and love each other, how could you even get the relationship started?
Heart is the most important thing of all to me because it is where you lay your faith and it is the only the thing that would keep the two of you to hold each others’ hands along the path where you would be walking together. be it a narrow and winding path or a smooth and straight path.
Trust (信)
This is the second most important element that comes right after heart, why?
easy, without trust between the couple, it would be meaningless for them to even get started on a relationship. without trust, there would be lies, suspicions, doubts, guessing, assuming, accusing, imagining, then questioning, arguing, quarreling, fightings and eventually hurting each other.
however, if you thought the type of trust i meant are those “i let him/her go out with other guys/girls alone wor… i trust him ah” i’m sorry to say this but you’re not even half way there yet. the trust that i mean here includes getting connected between the two of you yet still giving each other sufficient privacy and personal space, having faith in what your partner do, believe in what he/she is capable of and give him/her support when he/she needs it, believe that he/she will be your reliable partner when you have difficulties understanding certain things in life, you are certain that this is a person whom you can put your faith and depend on, no matter what happens.
that is what trust truly means.
Sex (性)
Last but not least, Sex. A lot of people might not agree with me on this part, especially girls. so why would i even put this in the first place? because sex makes up a very big part of a guy’s brain? nope, because it is a part of us which we can’t live without, ever since the times of our forefathers. it is our natural instinct to seek gratification, gifted to us by nature, it is also the most intimate physical bonding between the two of you. to me, it is a sacred ritual between two beings, the union of two loving beings. of course, i am talking about making love here, not fucking.
you can argue that the both of you are doing as fine even without sex. but trust me, it will be better if you had. the physical bonding from sexual relationship is so strong that after every healthy session, you would feel so much closer to your partner.
so, who say sex is not important now? it is as important as air and water to us. still not convinced?
read this article from forbes
my anwser to you, dear Ms. I-Don’t-Know-Who, is i refer the act of the girls to “jual mahal” or the guys to “act macho” simply an act to get attention, that’s all. it was never at all important to get a relationship to work, however, those might be the things that get it all started. and by the way, i guess the only time you need to play a little bit of naughty games is when you lock the both of you in that tiny room.
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